Vertigo Ambrosia (vertigo2120) wrote in madpash,
Vertigo Ambrosia
vertigo2120
madpash

Yes, I'm insanely fast with these ideas...

Title: Keno(Hate)
Challenge #: 24
Fandom: Evangelion
Warnings: Spoilers for every spoiler episode through 19.
Disclaimer: I don't own Evangelion, its characters, its setting, or Hideki Anno. (though I wouldn't mind owning his writing skills...-_-)
Notes: Takes place around episode 20, after the Zeruel...incident. 412 words.

Asuka Sohryu Langley lay on her stomach in her ransacked room, trying to keep the tears from breaking through. Her shoulders still throbbed painfully from her last fight, but she could normally have shrugged off the pain. Normally, she was strong enough to deal with the pain, because she was an Eva pilot, and she was the best one out there.
But today she found out...no, she realized that was a lie. She was not the best. She wasn't even close to the best.
Her Eva had sustained the most damage. She had not been hurt the worse, but only because she had the great idea of using an N2 mine. Even though it hadn't worked, everyone thought it was such a great idea, a brave and noble thing to do. That silent know-it-all had beaten her. She had gotten closer to defeating the Angel..she had done better...
Asuka hated that. She hated it almost as much as she hated her. She saw her sometimes, with Commander Ikari. Always the perfect one. She would do just anything for him, and Asuka hated it. Hated how submissive people could be. Hated how they so easily turned into what she hated most of all.
Asuka hated that stupid doll, hated her with all of the hate she had inside her. She had torn up her entire room, practicing different ways that she wanted to rip that doll apart. She would never again let a doll replace her.
She shuddered. Even if the doll was taken care of, she still had invincible Shinji to deal with. The two of them seemed bitterly perfect together. The Invincible Shinji and Wind-up Wondergirl. To think she had once kissed that son of a bitch. If that whiny loser could be so great, why couldn't she? Asuka threw her pillow at the mirror. She hated this world, this world where dolls and idiots were heroes, and she was merely second-best.
She had not gotten to the Angel. Wondergirl had touched it. The Invincible Shinji had defeated it.
This was a world that she did not want to live in. She wished that she had never been born, or she had died fighting the Angel. At least then, she would be a hero too.
The pain in her shoulders had regressed, but Asuka didn't notice through her sobs. There was really no point in caring.
There was no point to her without being the hero that was in the Eva.
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